Featured Unknown/Underrated Song: "Partners In Crime" from Rupert Holmes

One of the underlooked songs of 1980 was this hidden gem from Rupert Holmes, the same guy who gave us "Escape (The Pina Colada Song)" and "Him":

"Partners In Crime"

Rupert Holmes

Music and Lyrics by Rupert Holmes

She's under-age and she's underweight
And she's one month hooked and she's two months late
She comes from Wyoming
And he named her Desiree

She hit New York like a farm-fresh egg
Hits a frying pan, she's too proud to beg
So she works on the sidewalk
He administrates her pay

She calls him Swagger 'cause of his hat
He adopted her in three seconds flat
By the bus station doorway
Where he found her half-alive

He is her family and in return
He beats up on her and takes all she can earn
And she needs him so badly
Losing him she'd never survive

Him and her, me and you
We do it to each other whatever we do
Hand in hand, arm in arm
It's always been the two of us doing us harm
It's the same deal every time
We're all of us partners in crime

She is a buyer for Bloomingdale's
He's division head of commercial sales
They met at the office
Odds we one to one they'd meet

Work is the great aphrodisiac
It's that nine-to-five gets 'em in the sack
Afternoons at the office
Evenings at the health retreat

And all day long he just balls her out
'Bout some shipment due on the air freight route
But when they leave the office
Guess who gets the upper hand?

She's into power, he's into pain
And beneath her heel, he will long remain
And he needs her so badly
Loves it when she takes command

Him and her, me and you
We do it to each other whatever we do
Hand in hand, arm in arm
It's always been the two of us doing us harm
It's the same deal every time
We're all of us partners in crime

If there's a heaven, if there's a hell
It's made up of those who we love so well
And we make hell or heaven
As we do when we're alive

Two people meet and they fix their deal
And they get what they deserve
And they want the way they feel
And we need love so badly
Losing it we'd never survive

Him and her, me and you
We do it to each other whatever we do
Hand in hand, arm in arm
It's always been the two of us doing us harm
It's the same deal every time
We're all of us partners in crime